Unconditional love is painful for me

Its hard to always give, only a parent can give that to a child. Mother Theresa is unbelievable.

Knowing to always give and not expecting anything is painful especially U love this person vy much.

But one thing, the person u love, will carry on to be happy, and having u by her side, if she do look for u, be it good times or bad times.

She will be happy, or if not happier, when she met the appropriate better person out there. We always looking out for the better choice, aren't we, especially in love.

Wish her find the best lover and hubby in the next few years time, and she be married off in the beach wedding she had imagine, a beautiful white gown, her perfect smile, and perhaps me being there to see her @ her one of this happiest moment.

Fool in love time to wake up

My duty for this yr is done. My final mission. To celebrate birthday with her. I saw her blow the candles, cut the cake, make her wish.

I will not be passing the present after all, she mention she wont accept the gift from me unless its her farewell...despite she accept the gifts from her other friends. Instead, i send her the video i make several months ago. It has undergo many editions and changes, and today, i wont be making any changes to it anymore.

I sense its time to remove this needy and clingy me out of her life. Time to move on. My last duty, or my wish to see her till her bday, is done.

I shld be thankful. Next year, most prob, we will be strangers...even though my confession isn't working, i can sense its not possible, but she always will say I assume too much....but it is me now, that feels, I'm not capable of bringing happiness.

Happy birthday to this special gal...U have make me strong n weak @ the same time...guess this is what love is.

Just the way you are Lynn from alexchoo on Vimeo.

Bday gift for the special gal

Went to ion 2 times, was pondering to get Swanroski crystal, but it doesn't suit her. Went to the premium bags stores, but none got my interest and the budget im looking for.

Tiff and Co was crowded @ Taka, thus decided to go in to have a look. Finally decided on the gift. Hope she like it.

The staff is friendly. I told her it was a gift for a friend, but i won't want it to be too expensive as i worry she may not accept it. The staff is friendly and intro me to a couple of pendents based on my preference. A girl was speaking to her girlfriends about this pendent :), thus this is it. I'm buying it.

The staff do a ribbon bow around the box, a green one, and say she can exchange the stuff within 30 days for any items for the same value, but no price will be shown in the receipt.

Going to buy a wrapper, and untie this beautiful bow knot. Going to retie the bow knot again, hope i will get it right.

Its only when you do things for the ones you love, you feel there is value in life, worth waking up for everyday.

Crazy me

Already planned my year end celebration for yr ending 2011 to 2012. Maybe i now i wont be with her this year, but next year, when i back stronger, better, with this plan, it will be perfect?

But thinking of my current circumstances, it seems I'm crazy.

What I'm going to do to keep myself active, brain active.

Short term cash flow ideas
Photo stock portfolio, abt 100 photos if possible regularly, selling online via websites

Garge sales of my collections, be it comics, my ayumi stuff, robot models, cds. anything

Wow gold mining? Something i been playing, a game to generate revenue? Why not?

Long term
Wordpress or website for photography shoots, a company name, for the 2011 wedding shoots, c if i can get a slice of this pie, building from the stock portfolio shoots

Iphone apps, yes, im been talking abt this, now i got time, time to study the java codes, hope this old dog can learn new tricks.

Stock investment - passive mode, observing for low cost rather than break peaks trend

Sending resumes, getting back to my feet.

[KTV]陳奕迅-聖誕結

Cascada Last Christmas

陳奕迅 - Lonely Christmas

你敢做敢当

Seems like this is the where the joke come from

U dare to sit on the potato...adultery.

Creative or jus lame

Saw this in hardware zone forum

You dare to sit on potato - that is the forum title.

Seems like a few understand, some dont, it turns out, its

sh translation: 你敢坐敢当


HAha..have a gd laught out of this
HAHAHA, get it?

The chinese words mean you dare to stand up for what u say.
But if u speak these chinese words, it can be heard as a hokkien language,
n it will mean, "u dare to sit on the potato"

I think sg does not have its own language, but we learn a couple of them, and use them to our liking, and make it our own...a mixture of verbs n vocabs..haha..thats Singaporean to me.

almost 12

Blogged 2 entries at one go, a happy one, or at least, not a sad one...

but looking @ the time, its almost 12am...

i wonder if she has left the office
she has taken a ride from any of her bfs home
or mayb having supper with friends
or is she still struggling @ work

but whatever she is doing, im not in the picture...so why would i even bother?

i dun know why i have to think this way...its just the way i am?

No matter what, hope ur doing good and at least, away from work, thats the best @ this time.

Batam Trip after my last day @ work

I was moody, my heart was with her..missing my colleagues and wondering why all has ended...

Thankfully, the dudes who are with me, are kinda fun.

M, a fren, lost his iphone 4...ouch rite...feel like laughing @ him...but of cos, i understand how he feel.

K, a fren, was inspired, and sing a song, i decide to remake it and make it a full song..haha


M lost iphone4 this christmas

Last month, M give himeself iphone4
but the very next day he went batam and gave it away
N give it to someone special special

Once bitten and twice shy
M keep leaving his phone on the table top
Tell me M, have u not learn
Well it's been a year, it doesn't surprise me

(Happy Christmas!) M wrapped it up and sent it
With a gorillaz casing saying "I lost it again" and I meant it

Branded gifts for Xmas

Actually 2 of my favorite gals are december babies, so im quite nervous about it, getting their presents for them...but alot has happen...so its kinda difficult to explain the whole story...the point is...that dont do last min shopping especially the gifts are for the ones you like.

Actually order a pushie doll from a online site, a overseas one...its epic fail...meaning the online site fails to deliver my goods on time before her birthday...thats sucks..hope it will be there before Jan..or im going to rant and complain. I order 5 of the dolls, and wanted at least a pink one. I'm wasnt sure of the quality im going to get...so order more...but going to give just one...I'm crazy rite? All these for a gal whom i have no confident of dating.

Well...im just being myself..if this is what i am..then i just do it.



So since im not going to have the doll on time, i went to check out the branded bouqties in SG...i saw a coach model on the coach website, but i cant buy it, so authorization error...i using Vpost to send it to SG, but still cant get thru....

Went to almost all of the coach boutique in SG, DFS, Taka, isetan and mbs...coach is almost like a warehouse...ppl are grabbing the bags as if its free...and all its left are the ones i dont like...

i also queue up for my first time to go into a LV and Chanel boutique...its damn expensive...its not like i cant afford it, but if i were to buy it, i wasnt even sure if she want to accept it as a friend..we arent even in a relationship...getting a purse also seems hard with none seems to be good enough...

Burberry, Hermes, TODS, MIU MIU, RALPH LAUREN, I visited them all, and also Tiffany n CO.

Love tiffany n co...i will get a necklace for my girl, if i have one. I saw a open heart pendant with diamonds. Thats gorgous!



Lovely

Change of direction for 21st dec

Time to turn the blog entries into a happy, nonsensical blog...instead of a pessimistic one.

No more sad lonely boy, but a questioning, observing, debating, kuai lan boy.

If your a foreigner or not a local, kuai lan, means naughty. Its a hokkien dialect translation for the word naughty.

Kuai lan - naughty

Get it?

its gone

1st monday...its just gone like this.

my mind is just thinking about her, her bday, bothering others about what to give for her.

feel like a nuisance...so what if i make her happy wit the gift..haha...

why all of a sudden im selfish about my own happiness...

isnt that what friends are for...

guess...i know what im getting...

thats it then...

Mind in a whirlwind

No clear directions after coming back from taiwan.

Everything is still the same, the world is moving, but i'm not.

My days are almost ending in the company. Cant help feeling lost and abandoned.

Im not sure where i want to go, aint confident of myself anymore.

The dragon has lost its wings, and fall on to the land and lost its leg...im worried i will soon bury myself in the mud and lost my eyes.

A problem solved is better than more problem. Nothing fruitful will happen right now. Sour grapes, this isnt the first time im eaten, but i just cant think why i cant deserve to be happy...

2 weeks more. Time will fade these memories.